Chapman is a graduate student at the University of Southern California Suzanne Dworak-Peck School of Social Work and the mother of six children. She lives in Escondido.
As I drove my 4-year-old to preschool along our usual route, passing by the familiar sights of the grocery store, stop lights and loitering pedestrians outside the gas station, I noticed something out of the ordinary. There she sat, on the curb of a busy road, surrounded by luggage, duffle bags and grocery sacks, with several children huddled around.
Even without knowing her circumstances, I could discern the look of defeat in her eyes. As a mother myself, I understood the immense burden of responsibility she carried, the pressure of being her children's sole source of security and stability. After dropping off my son, I pulled over and approached her to inquire if everything was alright. It wasn't.
She had recently summoned the courage to leave her abusive husband, resolved never to return. However, they had just been evicted from the motel where they sought refuge for the past few nights. With no money and no plan, they were left stranded. She had called the emergency line, 211, but wouldn't know her eligibility for assistance until the following day, or possibly even the next week.
It's tempting to wonder why she hadn't planned better, but the harsh reality, as reported by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, is that one in four women are affected by domestic violence in their lifetime. In San Diego County alone, this translates to well over 300,000 women . According to the San Diego Association of Governments crime report, in 2021, there were 18,185 cases reported . These victims come from all walks of life, regardless of gender, race, age, income, religion or education status.
Domestic abuse thrives in secrecy, exploiting manipulation, fear and power to control its victims. It strips them of confidence, relationships and resources. As I looked into the eyes of that mother and her children, I witnessed the devastating impact firsthand. I couldn't simply drive away. I gathered their belongings into my car and found them a different motel, using the last of my family's monthly budget to pay for two nights.
However, shelters were full, unable to accommodate her family due to its size. Some victims are offered limited hotel vouchers through emergency services. Over the next week, as the rain poured down, I worried about where they ended up.
Steven Anderson, director of Crisis House, highlights that without help, victims face the agonizing choice between living on the streets or returning to their abuser. Many lack the skills and confidence to fend for themselves, having been financially and emotionally dependent on their abusers for too long.
Organizations like Crisis House provide crucial support, offering case management, life skills training and transitional housing. However, funding from the Department of Housing and Urban Development typically covers only six to nine months of such support. Anderson notes that victims often need one to three years to rebuild their lives, secure employment and address their mental health.
One Safe Place , where victims are often referred after calling 211, connects families to resources like Crisis House. Yet as their staff acknowledges, there are usually not enough beds in emergency shelters to protect women and children in crisis situations in San Diego County. The demand far outweighs the available supply.
Escondido serves as an example of one of the few cities in the county addressing homelessness, but it is overwhelmed by the needs of its unhoused population. Similarly, many cities lack shelters specifically tailored to serve vulnerable women and children, who are disproportionately affected by domestic violence.
California receives an annual federal block grant of $5.7 billion allotted to Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, a sum that has remained stagnant since its inception in 1997. However, California has accumulated over $544 million in unspent Temporary Assistance for Needy Families funds. What if we began by utilizing the excess and reallocating a percentage of the annual Temporary Assistance for Needy Families budget toward survivors of domestic violence seeking self-sufficiency? Could we establish more shelters in the county dedicated to this at-risk population, while also extending much-needed comprehensive services for a few years? By doing so, we could potentially lift families out of not only abusive situations but also long-term poverty, thereby freeing up more Temporary Assistance for Needy Families funds to assist additional families in need.
We must offer room in the inn, intercepting these families before they become homeless or are forced back into the arms of their abusers. It's time for accessible and timely solutions to support our community's domestic violence victims on their journey to safety and healing.
This story originally appeared in San Diego Union-Tribune .
Most Popular
Comments / 0