The 3-Word Question that Banned Me from Bible Class.

.Photo bynakedpastor/John Follis

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This is about an experience I had at a church that, for 20 years, had been a big, valued part of my life. I attended weekly, got involved with leadership, went on over 30 church retreats, and developed a personal relationship with the head minister and several associate ministers. However, as the years passed my attitude about the church changed. On multiple occasions I either noticed or personally experienced church-related things that contradicted what they preached. As a result I began detaching from it. And, at the time of this experience that I'm writing about, I'd mostly discontinued my involvement. I’d only occasionally pop into the coffee-hour after service to try to see my friends.

As I was leaving after one of those visits I was approached by a young guy who invited me to join him at something called “Bagels & Bibles”. “Bagels & Bibles” was touted by the church as a place to ask, and get answers to, any Bible-related questions in a relaxed atmosphere over bagels and coffee. It was run by one of the ministers. Since, I had been in church Bible groups before and had little interest in any church activity at this point, I declined the offer. Yet, the guy persisted, “Oh, come on, it's a great group. You have to check it out. Come on, we gotta go… it’s starting now.” The guy was not giving up and since I had no other plans, reluctantly, I agreed.

Photo byBill Tucker

A few moments later I found myself in a crowded room with folks chatting over their bagels and coffee. The minister then asked everyone to be seated and opened the group with a Scripture reading. Being the Christmas season he chose the passage about the shepherd in his field who was visited by a heavenly angel who came to announce the birth of Christ.

Coincidently, that week I had just watched a History Channel special that examined the birth of Jesus as presented in the Bible. It included expert commentary from Bible scholars, anthropologists, historians, and clergy leaders who all agreed that most Biblical stories, like the one the minister just read to us, were just that… stories, and shouldn’t be taken literally as fact.

When the minister finished his reading he opened the floor to questions. He scanned the room and when no hands went up he asked again, But still, not one hand. Reflecting on the History Channel special, and with no hands going up, I decided to raise mine and ask the simple question that was on my mind.

“Yeah, about what you just read… Is it true?”

The minister reacted like I just threw a glass of water in his face. He just froze and so did everyone in the group as a hush came over the room. Realizing my question had stunned the minister I felt the sudden need say something…anything.

“… um, because this past week I watched a History Channel special, and … yada, yada, yada.”

As I spoke I could see him breathing again and when I finished, he finally replied: “Well, to answer that I guess you just have to ask yourself… ‘What is truth?’”

Now I froze. “What-the-hell does that mean” I thought to myself. The room was silent.

Though I didn’t understand the minister’s response it was clear he wasn't prepared for the question, didn’t appreciate it, and wasn't real eager to discuss it, otherwise I would’ve continued the conversation by asking him what he meant. Instead, I let it go and that was the end of it. I’m not even sure what happened after that, I just recall regretting accepting the invitation to the group.

In the days that followed I couldn’t stop thinking about it and the minister’s esoteric response…”You just have to ask yourself; ’What is truth?’” I had been asking myself that question for decades. What I wanted was answers and Bagels & Bibles was supposed to be the place to get’em. What a bogus group, I thought to myself. I also thought the minister blew a great opportunity because my question was the perfect catalyst for him to engage the group in a good discussion — which was the whole idea of the group. And, by doing so, he would've been able to conveniently side-step trying to answer it directly himself, which was clearly a problem for him.

In a way I felt bad for the guy. There he was, a church minister and supposed authority on the Bible, standing in front of 50 people to answer their questions, and the first question he gets, about whether the Bible verse he just read is true, and he can’t answer it.

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One Month Later

A month later I received a letter from the church on church letterhead, written by a senior minister with a cc to the head minister. After telling me what a “valued member” of the church I was it then requested that I not attend any more Bagels & Bibles. The minister justified the request by informing me that the group was only for the church ‘Young Adults’ under 40. I was 46.

After reading the letter I couldn’t believe what I’d just read. The church was formally telling me that I was too old for their Bible group. For the next few minutes I tried to process it. The letter was coming from a church that didn't just pride itself on being inclusive, it boasted about it… on its website, on its radio commercials, and on all its other promotional materials.

What’s more, I had only attended the group once and never returned. It wasn't like I was returning weekly and causing problems. And, how did they even know my age? The letter was disturbing on so many levels. But, what bothered me most was what was painfully clear to me. That it wasn’t my age that triggered the letter, it was my question.

My immediate reaction was to respond with my own letter, but instead I reflected on the reasons I had detached from the church and realized that the letter just confirmed those reasons. Though the church had been a big part of my life for many years it was now clear that the relationship had run its course. All the letter did was make it easier for me to finally realize that.

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The Following Years

In the years that followed I came across many stories about others who’d left their church, religion, and even God for reasons similar to mine. And, when I heard about how many ministers were leaving church, religion, and God, I really became intrigued.

I channeled that curiosity into months of research which led to something I neither planned nor thought I was even capable of — making a documentary film. Entitled “Leaving God” the film that I produced explores the shifting attitudes in America away from religion and God. It also documents my own experience paralleling that trend.

Being my first serious attempt at filmmaking I was shocked when I learned it won a “First time filmmaker” award from the Hollywood International Documentary Film Festival. And I was shocked again when I discovered that it somehow got on a website called “Top Documentary Films” where it was prominently featured with a great review. As a result, the film has currently been viewed by over 40,000 people from 98 countries.

Ironically, it also allowed for something that the Bagels & Bibles group didn’t. Via two dozen podcast interviews I’ve had the opportunity to engage in many thoughtful discussions about God and religion with people from around the world.

Though that particular church experience was upsetting to me at the time, had it not happened I’m not sure I would've been motivated to follow the path that led to my film. And the film turned out to be one of the biggest and proudest accomplishments of my life. And, maybe even more importantly, the film and the research that went into it, helped me to finally answer that burning question; “What is truth?”

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John Follis is an award-winning writer whose writing has appeared in “Mirror on America” a pop-culture anthology including essays from Stephen King and Dave Barry. He’s also written and produced an award-winning documentary entitled; "Leaving God”