If you had a moment last month where you felt down and out and like the whole world conspired against you, just remember...
1.
The person who learned one of life's most important lessons:
2.
The person whose grilled cheese is literally about to explode:
3.
The person whose sheets just got a sick new design:
4.
The person who will now be pioneering the "5,000-second rule":
5.
The person whose cologne bottle exploded in a way heretofore unseen by human eyes:
6.
The person who Hulked their dang door straight off:
7.
The person whose makeup bag absolutely exploded:
8.
The person who paid handsomely for the world's tiniest burrito:
9.
The person who gets the honor of playing a little "tickle, tickle" later in the flight:
10.
The person who will forever regret accelerating in that specific moment:
11.
The person whose chocolate chip cookies might be a tad overdone:
12.
The person who had quite literally the unthinkable happen to them and their poor toothbrush:
13.
The person who got themselves a nice sear:
14.
The person about to have a very white kitchen:
15.
The person whose landlord was kind enough to practice their amateur taxidermy on a kitchen counter:
16.
The person whose oven spontaneously combusted at the worst possible moment:
17.
The person who, like King Arthur himself, must now pull the sacred tuna from the sink:
18.
The person who was lucky enough to get a little extra protein in their bag of peas:
19.
The person who miiight have wanted to measure those stairs one last time before putting them in:
20.
The person whose Good Samaritan power lines saved the day:
21.
The person who found a little furry friend in their grapes:
22.
The person whose dog absolutely decimated their passport right before a trip:
23.
The inventor of a brand new bird poop latte:
24.
The person rockin' the sick new Rachael Ray tat:
25.
The person who got the Tiny Tim special at the restaurant:
26.
The person who, much like J. Paul Getty, will never, ever leave oil alone again:
27.
The person whose chocolate egg became a pile of chocolate goop:
28.
The person who got a liiiiittle took excited when opening their gift envelope:
29.
The person whose book made SURE there wouldn't be any spoilers for them:
30.
The person who is eatin' good tonight:
31.
The person who apparently had a small-scale oil spill happen in their kitchen, the likes of which J. Paul Getty would certainly be interested in:
32.
The person who's eatin' good on their cross-continental flight:
33.
The person who is currently in the splash zone for 1.5 pounds of pure, unadulterated BBQ goodness:
34.
The person whose "DO NOT BEND" envelope got bent...oh, it got bent:
35.
The person whose luggage ended up arriving like it had SEEN some things:
36.
The person who tried to be the "full-size candy bar house" and ended up with nothing but disappointment:
37.
The person who accidentally cooked their cheesecake on the surface of the sun:
38.
The person whose hard-earned money went to some crisp, cool air:
39.
The person whose steak was cooked to unfathomable levels of doneness:
40.
The person who broke their car in ways previously thought impossible:
41.
The person whose cookies are lookin' absolutely, positively scrumptious:
42.
The person whose neighbor pulled this wildly perplexing yet frustrating move:
43.
This person who is about to have a very cronchy lunch:
44.
The person with a computer that is now part soup:
45.
The person who got off the bus and stepped straight into Hades itself:
46.
The person whose dang teeth were fallin' out in the early hours of Thanksgiving dinner:
47.
The person whose cats seriously have it out for delicious pie:
48.
The person whose thumb tattoo seems to be drawn on with street chalk:
49.
The person whose dream of becoming an MLB middle reliever died that day:
50.
The person who learned the hard way that you should never wash a pillow in the washing machine like this:
51.
The other person who learned one of life's most important lessons the hard way:
53.
The person whose turkey miiiiiiight just be a little overcooked:
54.
The person who surely has the goopiest kayak around:
55.
The person who will forever be sitting in a lake of Diet Dr. Pepper:
56.
The person who added a brand-new ingredient to their makeup:
57.
The person who is about to play the worst game of bobbing for apples that has ever been played:
58.
The person who experienced one of the worst laundry disasters one can experience:
59.
The person who loves their child very much, I'm sure:
60.
And the person faced with Schrödinger's Shrek plate:
