'Tis the Season to Extend Beyond Ourselves

Many people downplay emotionality as weak and dramatic. Fearing emotion leads to overthinking and anxiety. Regularly avoiding emotions can leave a lot of unprocessed baggage that can feel overwhelming when confronted, but no emotion lasts forever. It’s common to hear well-meaning helpers telling you to “trust your feelings,” or “go...

There’s no timeline for grieving. Losing someone you care about changes a person fundamentally. It's OK to "oscillate" between facing grief head-on and taking a break at times. People often ask me, "Will my grief ever end?" The answer is yes, but it will most likely change you forever,...

Entering the new year means saying goodbye to the holiday season, a time typically regarded as the happiest time of the year, associated with things like traveling, food, family, friends, gifts galore, and more. After the holidays, you may have struggled to transition back to business as usual, and you may have found yourself experiencing some feelings of depression and anxiety following the holidays (post-holiday blues). You may have not felt ready to adjust back to your normal routine after spending time with relatives and friends. Maybe you felt slightly more sluggish or unmotivated after the holidays. You, like many other people, may have had a case of the post-holiday blues.

Grief takes as long as it takes; there are no shortcuts. It is a good idea to talk with someone you trust when you are hurting. It helps to accept that whatever you think, feel, or do is part of a new normal, at least for now. Experiencing a loss...

Masks help an individual show their selected strengths to the world while shielding their vulnerabilities. Being open to oneself is the first step in building trust in a relationship. Meditation is one of several ways that partners can learn to let go of the fear of doubt and uncertainty in...

Values represent a direction and associated behaviors that have the potential to bring joy and fulfillment. There is no finish line. The focus on values is at the core of a therapeutic intervention called acceptance and commitment therapy. A classic ACT exercise for accessing values is to think about your...

Romanticized success can drive unhealthy behaviors that contribute to burnout. Science shows we can shift behavior to protect our well-being through practices such as mindfulness and intermittent technology fasts. Hustle and grind culture is the new religion. Bursting at the seams, to-do lists and schedules are normalized. Messages flood our...

When one chooses the path of meditation to heal psychologically and spiritually, one forgets at times about feelings like compassion and forgiveness. One might even forget about the attitudes of kindness, generosity, and gratitude. When people meditate, they might experience feelings of ease, well-being, and lucidity. I have experienced these meditative states as beautiful and comforting. However, even though the practice of meditation allows a person to experience positive states, they need to support human, everyday living, rather than encourage escaping from what is difficult to face.

Sometimes, people don't want help, but their families do. Family members can learn skills to communicate more effectively with adolescents about issues from suicidal thinking to college applications. We can't control other people's behavior, but we can help them make good decisions by showing curiosity and respect. In my final...

Attention-seeking may seem like a uniquely modern preoccupation, but it derives from an ancient impulse: survival. Attention-seeking is often the attempt to make up for attention we were denied in childhood. The less we got, the keener the deficit. The downside of attention-seeking is defining approval as something external to...