Fury as Mom-in-Law Asks Parents To Hand Back Present She Made Grandson

A grandmother who gifted her newborn grandson several handmade items of clothing has sparked anger after asking for them to be returned.

In a post shared to Mumsnet by writer hattiez, the mother-in-law was outed for telling her son's wife she wanted the items back to give them to a relative with a baby on the way.

The request was met with anger from her grandson's mom, not to mention those following the post online.

Returning a gift is normal enough. A survey conducted by coupon website retailmenotfound that last Christmas 38 percent of respondents exchanged a gift in the days immediately after December 25.

But while it's increasingly acceptable for the recipient to swap out a present, it's highly unusual for the giver to do the same. Yet that is exactly what happened to the new mom who took to social media to share her disbelief at her mother-in-law's demands.

According to the post, the items included a selection of knitted and crocheted cardigans, jumpers and other baby outfits, as well as a couple of blankets.

One even had their son's name on, while the mom-in-law had been careful to ensure the colors and designs of the items matched those of the baby's nursery.

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But the thoughtful nature of her efforts were critically undermined when she told them a "distant member" of the family was about to have a baby and she would need the knitted items back to give to them.

"My son is a young toddler and we hope to have another child shortly so we haven't passed on any of the baby things yet as we hope to be able to use them again," the newborn's mom explained.

Though she insisted she would usually "happily pass things on" her mother-in-law's request left her "shocked" as she would have liked to have kept the hand knitted things regardless "in appreciation of the love and work gone into them."

She wasn't alone in criticizing the move. Commenting on the post, Buzzer3555 said: "It's definitely strange of her but all you can do is return them with good grace."

Others, like Mountainpika, however, refused to play ball. "A gift is a gift and the giver should never ask for it back," they said. Hymnulop added: "Just say no, thank you, we're keeping them for baby no.2. End of."

"Just tell her they mean a lot to you because they were handmade specially for your son and you want them for your next one," Tarasharp said. "Unbelievable that she'd ask for them back."

The idea of taking the gifts back was met with similar disapproval by Diane Gottsman, National Etiquette Expert at The Protocol School of Texas, who told Newsweek: "Ultimately, once a gift is given it is rude to ask for a gift back."

"The mother-in-law 'gifted' an item to her daughter-in-law. Therefore, it belongs to the daughter-in-law, her son, and ultimately the child who may one day want to pass it along to their own child if it's still in good condition as an heirloom."

Gottsman added: "If the mother-in-law wants the new baby to have a special gift, she should consider either making something new or purchasing a new gift. As with most special baby items, it may be something near and dear to this particular family and it's up to the receiver to determine whether she wants to pass it along."

While she speculated there could be some air of contention between the mother-in-law and her son's wife, the bottom line was "a gift should be given with no strings attached."

"It's unrealistic to expect someone to release a gift that had been given to them, either purchased or handmade," she said. "Unless there was a prior agreement when the gift was given that this handmade piece would be handed down, it belongs to the person that it was originally given to. "

Newsweek was unable to verify the details of the case.