Bridesmaid Miffed Over $68 Bachelorette Party Cost Sparks Debate

A woman has sparked an online debate after saying she thought she was scammed by a fellow bridesmaid who is organizing a bachelorette party for their common friend, who is getting married next year.

In a post shared on Mumsnet last Wednesday, under the username Mummyof287, the woman explained that she's going to be a bridesmaid at her close friend's wedding, and one of the other bridesmaids is organizing an afternoon tea as a bachelorette party for the bride, but she feels she's asking too much money.

She said: "I am just a bit shocked at the price of the afternoon tea, which she has said will be £40 [$45.56] - then they are splitting the cost of the Bride (which I am MORE than happy to contribute towards) which brings the total p/p for day guests to £60 [$68.35].

"[To be honest] I was expecting the cost to be about £25 [$28.47] max (then the contribution for the bride on top). The going rate around here is £15-20 [$17.08 - 22.78]/head for afternoon tea, or £25ish at the poshest venues I guess. I mean it's £45 [$51.26] p/p at The Ritz in central London!"

A survey from The Bach, a popular bachelorette party planning app, found that 42 percent of respondents planned to attend at least two or more bachelorette (or bachelor) parties in 2021. The average party-goer spent from $5,500 to $7,000 in total on their trip, and about 77 percent said they rented a home for the party.

Hooman Bahrani, the creator of a wedding planning tool Wedding Day Timeline, told Newsweek that the real question is, "Why is it so expensive?"

He said: "Women are under more pressure than ever to have the perfect engagement and wedding experience. Unfortunately, it's almost always met with stress and expensive mistakes.

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"Ten years ago was very common to hear of a night out in a local place (usually where the bride lived)—dinner and drinks, go out downtown—and based on what they told me, it would be $250 to 300 per person. It was very uncommon to hear of destination Bach parties back then."

Bahrani added that the bride "definitely doesn't pay for the [bachelorette] party or the wedding portion of a bridesmaid," saying that bridesmaids pay their own way for all the party travel and expenses.

"On the wedding, they also have to pay for the bridesmaids' dress as well as a hotel if they're not local (Friday to Saturday night, because of rehearsal and rehearsal dinner) and gift," he added.

Most of the 185 users who left comments in the thread thought the price wasn't at all excessive, and that she could have just asked the organizer for clarity.

One user, NCFT0922, commented: "It's £60 [$68.35] for your friend's hen do [bachelorette party]. [You Are Being Unreasonable]."

And HoppingPavlova said: "Someone is REALLY bad at maths. If it is 40 a head and covering the bride means it is 60 a head then it means there are only 2 of you going as well as the bride. Is this the case?"

Another user, Bookworm20 wrote: "It's probably one with prosecco, which tend to be a fair bit more. I'd also balk at paying £40 for sandwiches and a bit of cake, but afternoon teas have always been pretty expensive for what they are. Around here they are usually about the £15-£25 [$17.08 - $28.47] pound mark. But I have seen some at really nice hotels and places for about £40 [$45.56] so it's likely to be correct."

WeAllHaveWings said: "Never understand why people can't just ask.... "£40 [$45.56], that sounds like it will be a posh treat, I've never been to one over 20 quid before. Where is it and what does it include? Will any additional drinks be extra?" And candycaneframe said: "[You Are Being Unreasonable]. That's fairly standard afternoon tea pricing, if it includes a glass of alcohol."

On the other hand, Spanielsarepainless said: "I can't see where the £60 [$68.35] comes from. If each person is paying £40 [$45.56] then contributing to the bride, I make that only two people going (£40+£20). If ten people are going, they would be paying £40 [$45.56] plus a tenth of that for the bride, which I make £44 [$50.10] per day guest."

And BattenburgDonkey added: "She said they are splitting the cost of the whole hen for the bride, so bride's hotel, afternoon tea etc, which is why it's 20 each for multiple people. I'm assuming the hotel is expensive based on the afternoon tea prices."

Newsweek was not able to verify the details of the case.