Members of a popular internet forum were outraged after one woman recounted her husband's request for a $5,000 personal vacation—and why he thinks he deserves it.
In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITheA**hole, Redditor u/Remaa5455 (otherwise referred to as the original poster, or OP) said she was taken aback by the request and detailed the heated aftermath of her decision to stamp out any inkling that she'd ever oblige.
Titled, "[Am I the a**hole] for refusing to fund my husband's vacation?" the post has received more than 6,000 upvotes and 1,000 comments in the last day.
"I (F/31) had a surgery that cost [$3,000] a year ago," OP began. "It was paid for by the joint account that my husband and I had."
Continuing to explain that she spent half a year recovering from the emergency operation, the original poster said she was finally able to return to work a few months ago.
The original poster also said that, after collecting a handful of paychecks, her husband's hand immediately shot out.
"My husband has been planning a vacation to a sports resort with his friends," OP wrote. "He told me about how much it costs [$5,000] and asked me to pay for it from my personal account.
"I was in shock [and] asked why should I pay and he brought up how much he paid for my surgery and how the money was supposed to go towards vacation savings," OP continued. "I said the surgery was an emergency...but he insisted the 'outcome' was the same.
"I refused...[and] he got irritated and started throwing around the words 'manipulation' and 'thief'...calling me names from selfish to ungrateful," OP added. "Then [he] got his friends to back him up saying that I'm 'obligated' to help him out just like he helped me out before."
After couples exit the honeymoon phase, exit their wedding and get back from their actual honeymoon, it's time to get down to brass tacks.
Money is a hot-button topic for many couples and according to a 2019 report by Insider, is the number-one thing that couples argue about, as well as a major factor in divorced couples' decision to separate.
While financial infidelity and clashing financial attitudes are often cited as cause for conflict, or cause for divorce, couples who combine their finances into joint bank accounts can be just as vulnerable to money-related tension.
Earlier this year, a survey published by CreditCards.com revealed that 43 percent of couples living together in the United States only use joint bank accounts, and that older couples are more likely to share finances wholly.
But according to financial services website BankRate, complete reliance on these types of accounts can have unintended consequences.
"While joint accounts are convenient and allow for financial transparency, they can also cause issues both in your relationship and your financial life," BankRate reporter Ana Staples wrote in March. "Potential problems include lack of autonomy, shared responsibility in case of a partner's missteps, and issues that can arise if the relationship ends."
Throughout the comment section of the viral Reddit post, many Redditors took issue with the financial demands issued by the original poster's husband and speculated that any issues arising from the end of a relationship might be worth it for OP's sanity.
"Give him the [$1,500] then separate your accounts," Redditor u/Prudent_Border5060 wrote in the post's top comment, which has received more than 13,000 upvotes. "Let him know that you will be having completely separate finances from now on.
"He is such an entitled jerk," they continued. "Comparing sports to a life saving surgery?"
Redditor u/Delicious_Wish8712, whose comment has received nearly 4,000 upvotes, echoed that sentiment.
"[What the f**k]" they wrote. "Give him [$1,500]. Tell him you have paid him back for the half he contributed to your surgery and ask if he wants to separate your finances going forward."
"Oh there's something they should separate," Redditor u/ghostofumich2005 added, receiving nearly 1,500 upvotes. "But it's not finances."
"Separate [lives]," Redditor u/ohnonotthisagain chimed in, receiving more than 4,000 upvotes.
Newsweek reached out to u/Remaa5455 for comment.
Uncommon Knowledge
Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.
Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.
About the writer
Taylor McCloud is a Newsweek staff writer based in California. His focus is reporting on trending and viral topics. Taylor ... Read more
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