The Sunday Scaries: What is it and how can you manage it

It's Sunday afternoon. We're sad that the weekend has come to an end and start to think about work or school responsibilities that will face us Monday morning.

For some people, thinking about the upcoming work or school week causes them to experience anxiety known by a couple of names: the Sunday Scaries, the Sunday Blues or The Dread, Kimberly Colston, a mental health nurse practitioner at River Solutions in Alexandria, wrote in an email.

"I've had clients who said they kind of feel down on Sundays," said Marguerite Wilcox, a licensed clinical social worker and supervisor at the behavioral health unit at St. Frances Cabrini Hospital.

It may be called the Sunday Scaries or the Sunday Blues but Wilcox said it can refer to any time when transitioning into a new week. For example, it could happen in anticipation of going to a class you hate that you're taking mid-week.

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It's called "situational anxiety" if Sundays, or transitional days, are the only day they experience the anxiety, said Colston.

The Sunday Scaries can stem from the negative mindset people have about returning to work or school. Colston said even though everyone gets like that from time to time, some are affected mentally by that mindset.

"They just can't stop thinking about it and it keeps going on in their head," she said. "And they just really start dreading that they have to go to work." 

It can start with the thought we've all had from time to time, "Blah! I have to go back to work," she said. 

Lifestyle changes

The issue can be managed by making some lifestyle changes like changing a negative mindset with a positive one, wrote Colston. Instead of thinking, "I know this is going to be a terrible week," change the thought to "I'm going to be very productive this week." 

Wilcox said there are steps people can take to help alleviate the anxiety they feel about the work week. She tells her clients to write out what they plan to do during the workday, check it again mid-day and see what can be moved.

She suggests doing some prep work on a Friday to set Monday up for success. That way when you do show up Monday, some things are already accomplished. For example, Wilcox said she had a social worker in the BHU do pacts over the weekend that she will need on Monday. They are ready to fax out and she can send those to aftercare for clients to be discharged. Even preparing an agenda for a Monday meeting can make a difference.

She also tells clients to move things they worry about on Mondays back to Fridays. Then, take another look at it and see if it's really that big of a deal. Sometimes clients worry about things starting on Sunday. She tells them to put the worries aside and then check on them come Monday to see if it was important enough to worry about.

"Because all anxiety really is, is projecting into the future problems that we anticipate," she explained

Overscheduling ourselves

Going into the new work or school week can give people anxiety because many tend to overschedule themselves.

"We're such go-go-go-go-go people," said Wilcox. They may also get mad at themselves if they take time off on the weekends when they hoped to accomplish so much.

Everyone has experienced some level of anxiety in their life, wrote Colston. It affects about 20 percent of U.S. adults.

"But it's really extreme for the people that have the actual anxiety," said Colston of the Sunday Scaries.

Physical symptoms such as an upset stomach, headaches, breathing difficulties or sleeping difficulties can start to manifest, she said.

If someone is in a bad work situation, just changing that could make a difference, said Colston. Transferring to a different department or getting a job that requires fewer responsibilities could get rid of the anxiety.

Anxiety from the Sunday Scaries is rarely severe enough to require help, but sometimes help from a mental health professional is needed, wrote Colston. Especially if it is interfering with appetite, sleep or work. Therapy or medications could help address the issue.

Being more mindful of our lives

Like any other anxiety, it comes down to being more mindful of our lives, said Wilcox.

"We have to rest our minds," said Wilcox. "We've got to rest our bodies. It's kind of like, have you ever been on vacation and you need a vacation from your vacation? Because we do so much stuff, and then we go back to work."

People feel like if they are not productive they are failures, she added.

"We don't relax really well," she said. "We're like fine-motor engines and you can't run a motor engine 24/7. You've got to stop and eat, so you've to put the good gas in. You've got to do the maintenance. You've got to go to the doctor."

She said you have to listen to your body and mind and pay attention to what is happening to you.

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Getting a good night's sleep the night before can help you start the work week fresh and well-rested, wrote Colston. Also, develop and plan a positive Monday routine such as a visit to your favorite coffee shop so you'll have something to look forward to. Organize thoughts and make a to-do list for the week so you can put your thoughts on paper and out of your mind. 

And, if the night before you'd like to enjoy a glass of wine to wind down, that would be fine, too, as long as it's done as a method to relax and not getting drunk just because of the dread of returning to work, she said.

"As long as it's not problematic, a glass of wine or another alcoholic would be fine to drink the night before," said Colston. "That could be a nice Sunday evening routine you have to look forward to."

Listening to the podcast "The Sunday Scaries" by Will deFries can help mange stress, she wrote.

Meditation can help

"There's proof that meditation, people who have meditated, have reduced their anxiety by 14 percent," said Wilcox. "And you can actually find that on headspace.com. And they actually have some mindful 10-minute meditations that you can do."

The meditations can be found on Netflix as well, she said. Meditation teaches people how to be mindful and live in the present, she said. That helps reduce anxiety. 

But most of all, said Wilcox, "We need to give ourselves grace."

"We're so prone to doing 100 percent. Sometimes, 80 percent is your 100 percent," she said. "And if you try something and it doesn't work, don't look at it as a failure. Look at it as a learning experience. When things go wrong, that's when we learn. When things go right, that's smooth sailing."

But it's our failures that we tend to think about and beat ourselves up over.

She said there is a famous quote by Thomas Edison: "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."

Wilcox said that's how we need to look at our own learning experiences as well.