NAME GAME

I’m refusing to give my son my husband’s surname – his parents are furious but it’s unfair on my family

TAKING your husband's surname can feel like you're losing a piece of yourself - so it's no wonder plenty of women decide to keep their own when they get married.

But what happens when you have kids? Do you go double-barrelled or combine them? Or do you pick one surname and stick to it?

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The woman has decided she wants her baby to have her surname in some wayCredit: Getty

Let's just say, things can get pretty complicated very quickly - and as with everything, it only gets messier when your in-laws get involved.

Unfortunately for one woman, this is the exact scenario she's currently facing after refusing to give her son her husband's family name.

Posting on Reddit's Am I The A****** forum, the woman explained how she didn't change her surname when she got married three years ago.

She wrote: "I agreed that any future kids we have will automatically take his last name. His family considers this huge deal and I decided to keep to 'just go with it'."

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But now that she's actually expecting a baby, the woman says she's having second thoughts.

She continued: "Recently I started thinking about it a lot more and figured that it would be unfair for my unborn son to take my husband's family name and not mine.

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"I talked to my family and they said my husband and in-laws are ridiculous to push this on me without a compromise."

After thinking it through, the woman suggested that they either combine their surnames or opt for a double-barrelled one for their son.

During the tense conversation, her husband wanted to know why she'd suddenly changed her mind.

He then accused her of being "selfish" and the woman's in-laws have been left fuming over the change of plan.

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The mum-to-be added: "We went back and forth on this and he said no way he and his family will let me do this to his son, as if my last name is a disgrace.

"We had a fight and we stopped talking after this. He said that I broke and violated my part of the deal and I should just 'deal' with it now but I won't accept it."

The dilemma sparked fierce debate in the comments - with some arguing that the mum was within her rights.

One replied: "People are allowed to change their mind. That’s the thing, we all continue to evolve.

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"[She] offered the compromise that it be a hyphenated last name. Seems fair."

Another added: "People change their minds all the time.

"She was 23 and he was 28 when they had this discussion, and I'm pretty confident she wasn't thinking too hard about the realities of having a baby at that time."

Meanwhile, a third argued: "She knew she agreed and knew he would have a problem with her change of heart and instead of talking like partners she went to the people she cares about more first to get her way.

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"This doesn’t seem like a marriage that is in great shape."

For more parenting stories, this mum of triplets showed off her GIANT baby bump which had her in ‘severe pain’ as people call her a real superhero.

And this mum revealed people snigger they hear her baby’s name & her mother-in-law said it’s awful…but they’re banned from seeing him.

Plus this paediatrician shared her four easy tips to get your baby into a regular sleep routine.

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