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Even when measuring against the many other emotional hits This Is Us‘ Jack Pearson has taken during the NBC drama’s run, Tuesday’s episode was a humdinger.
The hour unfolded completely within a flashback to the 1980s, to the week when Jack had to bury his mother, Marilyn. The subject matter put the heavy lifting on Milo Ventimiglia‘s shoulders, as Jack experienced intense regret over not getting to know his mother better after she successfully left his abusive father — and, of course, the crushing grief of losing a parent, which culminated in Jack’s painful sobbing in Rebecca’s arms at the end of the episode. (Read a full recap.)
TVLine spoke with Ventimiglia about his standout episode in the show’s final season and how a Season 3 episode figured into the request he made of co-star Mandy Moore right before shooting.
TVLINE | How far ahead did you know that Jack was going to lose his mom?
I guess toward the end of [Season 3], Dan [Fogelman, series creator] said that [Episode 4] was going to be a pretty big episode for me, and he just gave me the framework… I didn’t know much more about it until the script got published and we could all read it for production, and it was just heartbreaking. For me, the experience of losing a parent, I don’t know. I’m truly not looking forward to it. But I also understand there’s just so much yet to unpack as a person knowing that well, it’s done. Things are done.
The whole episode, where Jack is not only living in memory and remembering things from his younger years with his mom, but also having to confront just the logistics and everything before he gets to the point of realization that comes at the end of the episode when he says, “Rebecca, I don’t have a mom anymore.” It’s all just very heavy and overwhelming, and even though Jack has been the stoic lion rock that he is in making sure that nobody else suffers or deals any discomfort or anything, you know, he’s not impervious to it. He’s going to experience things the same as any other person.
So, going back in a very childlike way and saying to his wife, “I don’t have a mom anymore, it’s pretty heartbreaking.”
TVLINE | Talk to me about shooting that bit with Mandy Moore. What was the prep like? It’s such a big moment, I’d imagine you wouldn’t want to do it too many times.
We shot it chronologically from walking in the door. I think we had, you know, a few things before that whole sequence when they’re all getting back from the funeral the day in Ohio and to the food preparation and then the kids were sitting and eating and all of that. I remember just looking at the kids — and it’s all scripted, you know. Jack is feeding his kids this meal that his mom cooked for him when he was a little boy as well and I remember looking at Kaz [Womack, who plays Young Kevin]. Kaz looked up and smiled at me while he was eating, and it just crushed me — as it was intended to.
And I remember when we moved to the next sequence where Jack actually has to excuse himself and he’s in the other room, I remember Mandy just saying like, “Milo, what can I do for you, what do you need?” And I was like, “Just let me know that you’re there, you know?” But I think the man that Jack is, the product of the ’40s that he is, the man who went to war in the early ’70s, you know, he’s never going to show his emotion. So, knowing that his kids are in the other room and his wife is in there and all of that, he’d still keep his back to them, because he’d never want them to see it.
It’s like Season 3, I think, when they’re in the car and Rebecca’s singing a song and he has to turn away because he doesn’t want her to see how emotional that makes him. That’s just 100 percent Jack… So I was like, “Hey, just let me know that you’re there,” and cameras rolled and we stepped in, and I think I was on edge to begin with because of what we’d already filmed for the episode and working myself up for it. And Mandy walked in and put her hand on my shoulder and I turned around, and that was the scene.
TVLINE | I know everyone says this type of thing to actors, but as someone who does not have to do that in my line of work, I cannot imagine pulling that out of myself on command.
[Laughs] I mean, here’s the thing: I’ve been fortunate because Jack does not get emotional. He’s just not an emotional character, but it doesn’t mean that as an actor I can’t get myself there. It’s part of the job, it’s part of the resume, you got to be able to do those things in the special skills section… So, for me I think it was just really making sure that it was honest and it was real. And I absolutely was sweating with stress having to live through that realization and believe it the way that Jack believes it on camera.
And it also led to, the next time I sat with my parents, just sitting there. I remember I was just watching my mom. I was just watching her eat. She kind of looks at me, she’s like, “What’s up, buddy?” “Oh, nothing.” Just enjoying watching my mom eat, you know? [Laughs]
I’m getting so tired of all these filler episodes in the final season. They could have cut the final season to 10 episodes to make these episodes tighter. We definitely didn’t need to have a whole hour devoted to nothing but finding out what a jerk Jack was toward his mother, taking her for granted until she died.
Who hurt you?
Show us on the doll, Ann.
I’m willing to bet this will have something to do with how Kevin acts when Rebecca dies. So this was not a filler episode in the least.
I agree nothing is ever done in this show that doesn’t have meaning and/or ramifications to the rest of the characters and show.
On This Is Us everything leads to something else so there are no ‘filler’ episodes. You just didn’t like it.
Oh, Ann. You’re such a ray of sunshine.
Ann! That’s what you got from the episode? That Jack was a jerk toward his mother? Huh?
Milo absolutely deserves an Emmy nod for his work in this episode. That ending scene where Jack finally broke down made me weep. I’m really going to miss this show making me cry every Tuesday!
Actually I thought Jack’s “big scene” was the eulogy.
Excellent show this evening. I felt his pain, confusion and sadness about not spending more time with his mom. The mistake most of us make. Will miss this program when it ends.
I realize that Jack is not usually an emotional person, but it was really difficult to watch him being so cold (for lack of a better word) when talking to his Mother. Or about his Mother. I was like, this is your Mother, who you saved from a horrible situation. You should’ve done more than just have these quick conversations every Sunday at 6. Especially, when you became the only son. I don’t know, it still bothers me. To be fair, his Mother also seemed closed off. But I still put the majority of the blame on Jack. (Honor Thy Mother) I did love the scene at the end when Jack finally broke down. That was raw emotion. (well done, Milo) I love that story about Milo’s Mother. That’s super cute. By the way, the little Big Three are super adorable. Especially, the actors who play Kevin and Kate. He’s got a deadpan delivery that I love, and she’s just out-and-out funny. Randall is a little subdued, but still cute. By the way, I feel like they keep going back to that timeline when there is so much more to explore. Which I guess we see this coming week, so that makes me happy.
Did you not listen to his eulogy? Their relationship was a byproduct of growing up with an abusive alcoholic father/husband. He was not cold. He was taking care of his mother by keeping her safe. Yes he probably has regrets, but this is not all on him.
Kristy I guess you missed the eulogy. Jack was not treating his mom poorly any more than she was treating him poorly. They were both trying to move on from hell. In the best way that they knew how. Sure he made mistakes, so did she. Life is not cut and dry, if you’ve been watching this show for a few years you’d be atune to that theme. In this episode, while Jack and his mom loved each other, neither did well in the other’s presence because of all the bad memories. As the episode clearly pointed out….she was a completely different person when she was AWAY from Jack and all the memories. So while she bought skates for the grandchildren…did she really want jack to visit? Did she want him to know how much better she was doing when she was away from him?. (him also meaning the memories).
The Best episode in a drama series. You have touched the heart of all people who have mothers in a way never felt before – not having a mother anymore! So so hard to understand until it happens!!! Be proud young man! You deserve an Emmy!!!
I will miss this series, and hoping a spin-off will come back some day. Excellent actors and actresses, writers, and producers! Kudos to everyone of you who made this series so entertaining and meaningful ❤️
This episode really hit home for me, I just lost my mom in December and we were really close. she lived far away but we talked weekly. The scene where he broke down and said “I don’t have a mom anymore” just gutted me. Great job, Milo.
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