How to Manage Your Conflicted Feelings Better

Walking at a brisk pace for just 75 minutes every week could cut your risk of depression, a new study finds. The World Health Organization recommends everyone should exercise for at least two-and-a-half hours every seven days. But researchers at Cambridge University, England, found adults who got half as much...

Every parent has a unique take on what's needed in raising their children. They bring their own personality and life history to the job. Let it be OK that you and your partner have different perspectives on parenting. You may know best, but that's not what matters most. Calm, loving,...

"Manifesting" is a powerful trend in the world of self-help that belongs to a much older tradition of "mind cure" writings. Manifesting massively overestimates our agency and ability to control the external world, advocating magical thinking. It also ignores socioeconomic and psychological reality and may leave people feeling ashamed and...

The impacts of narcissistic parenting can be unique to the individual who lives through it. An adult child of a narcissist may believe their worthiness depends on how they act and what they do, not on who they are. Learning what healthy boundaries are and how to set them with...

Moving into the next stage of the pandemic requires taking stock of your personal tolerance for risk. Adjusting to heightened risk is nothing new. Budgeting for risk is a personal, ever-changing choice. In the early days of the pandemic, as the world was adjusting to a rapidly changing viral landscape,...

The trap of always wanting more is that you may undermine the very achievements you had worked so hard to attain. It is impossible to appreciate what you have when you are constantly sprinting toward the next goal. Maintaining a broad perspective of who you are can help you integrate...

Living things perform pattern-matching activities that call out differences. The perception of differences allows humans to predict and sort out cause and effect. Bias and prejudice seem to result from the impact of learning and experiences on the affect system. In a peaceful, secure world, differences can be a source...

Increased socializing can also bring greater exposure to unwanted questions about sensitive topics, like relationships or pregnancy. Remember: You get to choose what to tell other people and when. No one else can decide that for you. Certain techniques, like replying with a question, changing the subject, or complimenting others,...

In the dysfunctional narcissistic family system, the golden child is the most likely to develop a narcissistic personality. Sibling abuse by a favored narcissistic brother usually follows a predictable pattern of behavior. There are strategies that can help protect you from a narcissistic brother's abuse. Dysfunctional, narcissistic families typically feature...

Our emotions make us belong to our cultures. Our emotions are not mere mental feelings; we need others to feel the way we do. Moving cultures can be hard, and our emotions tend to be out of step. I was born and raised in the Netherlands, and I had always...

Honoring includes compassion, kindness, appreciating, blessing, nonharming, warmth, cherishing, and love. Honoring does not mean approving; you can wish people well while disengaging from them. Think of "thou" as a verb. To bless people is to thou them. I've been wondering what would be on my personal list of top...

Music is often regarded as a "language of emotions." Music has the capacity to mimic emotions. Music provides a safe space to experience negative emotions. One of the most important issues in the psychology of music is how music affects emotional experience (Juslin, 2019). Most music listeners use the emotional expression as the most important criterion for evaluating music. We often describe pieces of music as sad, joyful, tender, or harsh. What is the link between music and emotion? How does music affect our moods?

My father started his own business in 1960, a courageous decision for a primary breadwinner with seven children and an eighth on the way. His post-secondary business school offered one- and two-year programs for people interested in becoming managers and administrative assistants. My father read the town newspaper each evening,...

Many people with chronic and difficult-to-treat medical conditions often feel invalidated by the medical community. Due to the high numbers of people with long COVID, it is now starting to be taken seriously. Regardless of what kind of physical condition you have, psychological and behavioral interventions can improve quality of...

Our reactive thoughts to tasks create barriers to action; they promote procrastination. We are not our thoughts, and not identifying with our thoughts frees us to act. Ancient Zen wisdom in the form of a koan can help us discover this simple truth. Continuing with my focus on mindfulness and...

A new concept called self-connection may be central to one's happiness, life satisfaction, and well-being. Self-connection has three components: self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-alignment. Anyone can test their level of self-connection using a recently developed and validated scale. We often try hard to stay connected to others (e.g., to friends and...

People with long-term health conditions record their health data on a daily basis, but most of this information is never shared. Self-generated health and lifestyle data has the potential to help better understand multiple conditions and to transform care. The "health care revolution" will only be possible if we begin...

The fear of the experience of fear can bring about the very panic the person is seeking to avoid. Not everyone who has panic attacks has panic disorder. To help, a clinician must employ a series of interventions that can redirect the person's conscious attention during the feared situations. The...

People are, by their nature, political animals. Organizations are basically political systems with members all trying to get ahead. When someone lobbies for a raise, or does a favor for another expecting something in return, they are engaging in organizational politics. When people self-promote, they are acting politically. There’s nothing...

Therapists too easily forget the artistry of therapy itself. Engaging therapy as an artform helps clients make deeper connections and prevents burnout among therapists. The artform of therapy enables therapists to teach people how to make art out of their lives. “Who, me, an artist? But I’m not going to...