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Munroe with lots of clothes
‘The first time I ever felt gender euphoria was when a dear friend bought me a pair of very high, very chic Christian Louboutin heels.’ Photograph: Jason Bell
‘The first time I ever felt gender euphoria was when a dear friend bought me a pair of very high, very chic Christian Louboutin heels.’ Photograph: Jason Bell

Munroe Bergdorf: ‘Transition was an act of love for myself’

This article is more than 2 years old
The model and activist, 34, on bravery, happiness and getting back to nature

I grew up under the Tories’ Section 28 designation in Stansted Mountfitchet in Essex. That was difficult. It prohibited teachers from promoting homosexuality, which meant they couldn’t condemn homophobic bullying, either. I experienced a lot of bullying.

I see my transition as beautiful – it was an act of love for myself. I didn’t know how I was going to look at the end, but it was born the faith that I would be happier. I try not to think too much about what other people think. I try to focus on looking how I feel. That’s what’s brought me most happiness in my life

Bravery comes with healing. We all go through awful stuff. We’re all traumatised in one way or another. Life is hard. Bravery comes from confronting what you’ve been traumatised by.

I’m very conscious of the fact that tomorrow isn’t promised. We need to do everything we can with every day we have.

The first time I felt gender euphoria was when a dear friend bought me a pair of very high, very chic Christian Louboutin heels. I put them on and instantly felt like the woman I wanted to be.

I feel like with the internet we’ve lost the art of conversation. We need to get back to actually being able to find a common place, to push past disagreements. There’s nuance to the human experience. Nothing positive comes from seeing each other in 2D.

When Alexander McQueen passed, I felt the warmth drain from my body. It was a massive loss. What he did with his shows, how he presented them, was incomparable and unsurpassed.

I’m trying to get back into having experiences in nature. I grew up in a very rural area, so I’m enjoying going to nature reserves and national parks and Hampstead Heath and just bonding in real life. The takeaway from the pandemic is that there’s nothing like human energy. Being around those who support you and love you is an incomparable experience.

Music always transports me, I learned early that it’s a therapeutic tool, a way to process or bring out feelings, to change the way you feel. When I need joy in my life, I tap into nostalgia and listen to music that reminds me of better times.

I want to have children in five years. When you’re trans and unable to produce children myself with my own body, it’s obviously something that takes a lot of planning. But I love kids.

I try not to regret anything. It’s a waste of energy. I’m more focused on learning from the lessons I take from the things that I’m not proud of. We all make mistakes.

Munroe is supporting TK Maxx’s Give Up Clothes for Good in support of Cancer Research UK for Children & Young People

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