A mom has sparked a debate on TikTok after revealing the "unconventional" way she parents her 10-year-old daughter. So far, the clip has racked up over 865,000 views since it was posted on Sunday, surpassing 69,000 likes and 4,000 comments.
The TikToker, known only as @treeeflower, uses a range of parenting techniques that run counter to the advice of most experts—and viewers have strong feelings about it.
The clip begins with on-screen text that read: "Unconventional [and controversial] ways I'm raising my [ten] year old."
"No bedtimes. Or wakeup times," wrote @treeeflower. "Sometimes that means going to sleep at 5am and waking up at 4pm."
"Has never been to school," read the second parenting decision. She said that her daughter "chooses what she wants to learn and when she wants to learn it."
Other guidelines included "no limits on screen time" and "no sleep overs" with anyone, including family members.
Lastly, the TikToker wrote that her daughter "is encouraged to be opinionated and...speak her mind."
The parenting methods described in the clip are, indeed, controversial. According to the Sleep Foundation, for example, children who follow nightly bedtime routines "are more likely to go to sleep earlier, take less time falling asleep, sleep longer, and wake up less during the night."
More generally, as noted by Verywell Family, structure and routine help children "to understand limits and boundaries, to learn self-discipline, to experience frustration and delayed gratification and to appropriately interact with the world around them."
"You're also less likely to see behavior problems when you've structured your child's day," adds the parenting resource.
As the video blew up, viewers were quick to criticize the mom's admittedly unusual parenting tactics.
"I was raised like this," shared @dontberude35. "The lack of boundaries and routine and the 'freedom' made it so that the harsh world parented me later."
"She won't be prepared for the world," echoed @mussymiddlebrooks. "I love the idea but society will be tough."
Some, however, saw the TikToker's approach as a healthy alternative to mainstream parenting styles.
"This honestly sounds so amazing! The way our school system operates feeds workers to a capitalist machine. It doesn't nurture individuals," wrote @daniellekolibri.
Others, meanwhile, advised her to listen carefully to the criticisms in her comments section. "Respectfully, humble yourself and actually listen to the feedback you're getting from kids who grew up in this," wrote @dideerdear.
Newsweek reached out to @treeeflower for comment.
Uncommon Knowledge
Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.
Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.
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