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The only thing that is certain in the world is uncertainty. Things are continually changing, and it is more important than ever to develop our abilities to navigate complexity and uncertainty in healthy and productive ways. Our initial reactions to the complexity and ambiguity often take the form of worry and stress. 

Some degree of stress and worry can be beneficial to motivate us to necessary action, increase our ability to problem-solve and enable maximum performance. We also see daily examples of how easy it can be to get consumed by negative emotions. If we find ourselves overwhelmed by worry and stress, we become susceptible to anxiety, depression, or a host of other unhealthy outcomes.

We cannot control our thoughts and feelings, but we can control our responses. The goal is to take time to understand your negative emotions and what they are telling you before moving to solutions. To effectively manage worry and stress, it is important to understand the subtle distinctions between these two states and what actions are effective for reducing each one respectively.

 

WORRY

Worrying is feeling uneasy or being overly concerned about a situation or problem. We tend to experience worry mostly in our heads, and it is usually future-focused. With excessive worrying, your mind and body go into overdrive as you constantly focus on what might happen. Worry can be helpful and productive because it can thrust you into action and prevent procrastination. Excessive worrying and negative thinking will negatively impact your emotional and physical health. As worry is a mental state, these three cognitive tools can help to challenge and disrupt the negative impacts of excessive worry.

1) Talk to a Trusted Friend

Verbalizing your worries helps you return to your neutral state and diminishes the impacts of negative emotions. Feeling heard is an effective way to sort out your thoughts and help you regain perspective and see a situation more positively. Sharing your worries with a trusted friend can make a big difference in lessening its obsessive grip on you. Usually, you do not need others to give solutions for resolving your worries. What you do need is someone to listen as you work through your negative emotions.

2) Write Down Your Worries

Maybe you prefer to write your worries or want to reflect on them before sharing them with others. A regular journaling practice can help provide dedicated time to get worries out of your head. As you write down your concerns, here are a few questions to keep in mind:

  • What exactly is worrying you?
  • Are your worries realistic? What is the probability of them happening?
  • What are your feelings about the situation?
  • What is the worst-case scenario?
  • What steps can you take for a positive impact?

3) Define Your Control

Unfortunately, we do not have control over many of the things that happen in our lives. It is important to clarify which aspects of the situation you can control and the areas of the situation where you have no control. The point is to create awareness by defining the worries to let go of because they are beyond our influence while at the same time identifying the areas where our efforts will have a real impact. 

The belief about your ability to influence the situation impacts how you respond to challenges in your life and your motivation to take action. Research shows that individuals who have an internal locus of control are more likely to:

  • Have a strong sense of self-belief about being able to succeed
  • Work hard to achieve the things they want
  • Feel confident in the face of challenges
  • Achieve higher levels of success in the workplace

Stephen Covey’s Circle of Influence provides a practical framework for when one needs to challenge feelings of helplessness by identifying attitudes and activities within your control or influence that will enable you to improve the situation.


STRESS

Stress is a physical response to a perceived danger that prepares the body to be aware of and respond to threatening circumstances. Stress becomes negative when a person faces continuous challenges without relief or relaxation between challenges. As a result, the person becomes overworked, and stress-related tension builds. Below are two proven ways to reduce the negative effect of stress.

1) Develop a Healthy Stress Mindset

Stress is our response or reaction to a stressor which means stress should be, to a large degree, under our control. How can we respond to these stresses so that we do not get derailed, but in a manner that helps us to adapt and thrive under the circumstances?

Stanford researcher and bestselling author Kelly McGonigal shares research that shows one of the most important factors for healthy stress management seems to be how well people cope with stress rather than how much stress they face.

Studies show that people who view stress as a bad thing are more negatively affected regarding their happiness and health. Those who view it as a motivator report fewer symptoms such as headaches, backaches, and fatigue—even though they experienced the same amount of stress. The positive aspects of stress include improved cognitive ability and increased productivity and memory. A healthy stress mindset includes:

  • Seeing a stressful situation as a challenge rather than a threat.
  • Awareness that your response to stress is helping you prepare for peak performance.
  • Understanding stress is caused only by things you find important. Connect with the meaning, and you will be able to make stress work for you.

2) Breathe 

We have an intuitive understanding that breathing patterns can calm our thoughts and emotions. Most of us have either told others or been told by someone to "take a deep breath” when encountering difficult situations. Most clinical psychologists and medical doctors use breathing practices with patients. However, because breathing happens automatically, many of us do not give our breath much attention and have not harnessed its full potential to calm our minds and reduce stress.

One of the reasons breathing can change how you feel is that our emotions and breathing are closely connected. Researcher Pierre Phillipot made two profound discoveries about the connection between breathing and emotions.

  • Your breathing mimics your emotions. When you are excited, you breathe quickly and in a shallow manner; when you are calm and relaxed, you draw in slow, deep breaths.
  • Your emotions mimic your breathing. That means we can change how we feel by using our breath. If you want to get worked up quickly, start taking in fast, shallow breaths; if you need to calm down, take in slow, deep ones. 

Other physical activities that help reduce stress include:

  • Meditation
  • Regular Exercise
  • Sleep - a minimum of 7 to 8 hours at night
  • Rest and renew intermittently during the day

Those who are most successful at managing ongoing worry and stress know that it is not adversity but what we do with it that will most determine our results. What strategies help you lessen the negative impacts of worry and stress in your life?

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