6 ways to step up in your life

Instead of trying so hard to reinvent yourself, think about some simple ways to take baby steps. My research on this topic turned up some touchstones that speak to this very thing.

Show Up

“The willingness to show up changes us,” says professor, author and speaker Brene Brown. “It makes us a little braver each time.”

We’re all human. We don’t always show up as our best selves. “Most of us have days when we want to curl up in bed with our favorite comfort food, drag the covers over our head and make the world go away,” emphasizes clinical psychologist and life coach Karen Nimmo.

While that can soothe us temporarily, going into hiding is not a helpful strategy to use very often. If you’re scared of something, the very first step is to show up for it. In business, I often refer to a phrase about doing the hardest thing first: “Eat your daily frog.”

If you can get it out of the way — or, at least, chip away at it, you’ll go into the rest of your day with a feeling of accomplishment, without that sense of dread hanging over you.

Figure Out What Matters to You

“It’s not so much ‘what’ matters, either; it’s the story that goes with it that is revealing — the ‘why,’” explains Nimmo.

Just think about all the activities you’ve shared with others. You come away with one perspective, and someone else comes along with a totally different outlook. It’s all in how we’re “wired” and the life experiences we’ve had that have shaped us.

So, take a look at your triggers, your strengths and vulnerabilities. “Know what makes you laugh — and what freaks you out,” advises Nimmo. “The more you understand about your story, the better equipped you’ll be to write the ending.”

Stay Interested in Yourself

We’re always evolving — or devolving. It’s important not to lose sight of your connection to yourself and your world, which can often get drowned out. And then you end up living your life on autopilot.

There are so many ways to feed your soul. And it doesn’t take a lot. Surf the internet for some interesting articles — or watch a YouTube video. Go to a bookstore or library. Or sign up for a class. Sometimes our souls are so hungry that it only takes a few crumbs to satisfy our inner cravings.

Stay interested in the things that light you up.

Be Ambitious to a Point

“If you want to excel at anything — parenting, your job, our passion, whatever — you have to do the mahi (work),” says Nimmo. “You have to put your bum in the seat and your head in the game. You have to be consistent.”

I once read that one can become an expert at anything if he or she puts in 10,000 hours. While it may take more for rocket science, I find this an interesting concept.

If you can be consistent with anything on a regular basis, you’ll improve. “You’ll get good, then very good,” explains Nimmo. “Maybe even the best. But there’s a price tag to hard work — and you have to figure out if it’s worth paying for.”

This level of commitment to excellence can often wreak havoc on our bodies and souls. “Mega hard work is not always healthy, and it can cause us to lose sight of the bigger picture, aka life,” cautions Nimmo.

Listen to Life’s Whispers

Oprah Winfrey always advises us to listen to the messages that life sends us. “Get it in the whisper,” she says, “and don’t wait for the brick wall.”

Likewise, personal development coach Thomas Leonard says, “Opportunities don’t knock, they whisper. So shut up and listen.”

While we know the importance of getting “crystal clear” on our goals for work and life, it’s not that easy these days. The world has changed. It’s harder to predict trends, let alone outcomes, emphasizes Nimmo. Since a pandemic has dropped into the mix, it’s hard to even predict what the next few months will be like.

So, stay adaptable and attuned to what is important to you — and what you want out of your life — but stay flexible about the path you’ll take to get there.

Don’t Take Things Too Seriously

“When you’re stressed, your health’s suffering, your relationship’s messed up, your business is going broke and you feel lost and detached, it’s easy to approach each day with hunched shoulders and gritted teeth,” says Nimmo.

All of this can make life feel too heavy. So, have a few “go-to” activities that can help you lighten up. Listen to some inspiring music. Go for a walk in nature. Take a hot bath. Or watch a funny video. Life isn’t a sprint. It’s a marathon.

I’m reminded of one of my favorite quotes from a movie I watched years ago. “I’m content with who I am, and I’m proud of where I’ve been.”