How Have You Changed?

Taking stock of how we’ve changed can gratify us. And it can motivate us to change some things. Answering these questions should help you get clear on both.

Have you changed recently?

Your work life

Where you work. That could include a different boss, employer, or how much you’re now working at home rather than in a workplace.

What you do. That could include a formal change in your job description or a change in how you actually spend your time.

Your attitude toward work. For example, you could have become more welcoming or more resentful of work.

Your beliefs about your work. You could have come to believe that your work is more important or less so than you previously thought.

Your beliefs about work in general. You could have come to believe that work is more central or less so to a life well-led.

Your relationships

Who you live with. Of course, consider romantic partners, friends, roommates, or temporary visitors: for example, family members or Airbnb guests.

Who you otherwise spend a lot of time with.

Your romantic relationships. A change might be with whom you’re involved or how the relationship has changed.

How you feel about romantic relationships in general. You could have come to believe they’re more central or less so to your life.

Your family members. Changes would include people born, married, or died.

How you feel about your family members. Consider if and how your feelings about individual family members have changed.

How you feel about family. Have you come to believe that family is more important or less so than you previously felt?

Your friends. Have you made new ones? Changed the frequency or way you interact with certain individual ones?

How you feel about your friends. Has your attitude changed about individual friends of yours? For example, you might have come to conclude that talking about intimate things is more worth it or less.

How you feel about friendship in general. For example, have you come to believe that friendship is more central or less so to your conception of a life well-led?

Your day-to-day life

Where you live. Consider both the macro (geographic changes) and the micro (for example, moving to a different apartment in the same building.)

Your daily routine. Have your rituals changed around wakeup? During the day? After work? Bedtime?

Your recreations. Have you taken on any new ones? Spent more or less time on existing ones?

Your integrity. Have you become more principled or less so? If it’s in a specific context, specify.

Your prioritizing justice versus mercy. Some people have come to prioritize one over the other, in general, or with regard to a specific person or misdeed.

Your charitable giving. Are you giving more or less than in the past? Have you changed your charity/charities of choice? It’s wise to concentrate your giving if only to reduce charities’ costs of additional solicitations.

Your physical health

Have any changes occurred with:

• Your weight
• Your level of exercise
• Your substance use
• Your energy level
• Your following health care provider’s recommendations

Your mental health

Your level of contentment. That may not be synonymous with happiness. Some people have grown or declined in contentment because of how much they feel they’re contributing. It might help to, on a 10-point scale, compare your estimated contentment a while back versus now.

Your level of anxiety. Ditto the previous suggestion.

Your level of sadness. Ditto the previous suggestion.

Your level of anger. Ditto the previous suggestion.

Your definition of a life well-led. Some people define it as the pursuit of happiness. Others extol work-life balance. Still other people define it in terms of contribution. Has your definition changed?

The takeaway

Do your answers make you want to feel grateful about one or more things? To change one or more?

I read this aloud on YouTube.