Angry Woman Threatened to Kill My Grandchildren

On people behaving badly.

Image by Vicki Hamilton from Pixabay

Sometimes there are no words to explain how people can behave so badly. Grown people. People who should know better.

I stood there stunned with my heart racing, clutching my terrified grandson’s hand.

People behaving VERY badly

Recently I went with my family members (there were 5 adults, a teenage girl, a toddler boy, and an infant girl) to a hospital in Charlotte, North Carolina for a doctor’s appointment for my grandbaby daughter. As we were all getting into an elevator, a woman and her two sons were standing outside of the elevator causing quite a scene. The woman was cursing very loudly while the two young men stood there, forlorn and embarrassed. She was very angry at the doctors for some reason and was cursing violently. I was horrified at such disruptive behavior in a nice, orderly hospital environment. It was out of place, her language over the top offensive, and my grandchildren were watching this screaming woman act a fool in public. I felt so bad for her two sons, who clearly wanted their mother to just stop.

As the elevator doors were closing, my three-year-old grandson said something about the screaming and yelling. I don't remember exactly what he said but it was something to the effect of--hey, that woman is not using her inside voice. I said to him “No, honey we don’t act like that.” Meaning, no, we don’t yell and cuss. I didn’t mean for anyone to hear me but him, but clearly, I didn’t speak quietly enough. In retrospect, it likely came out a bit harsh or maybe judgemental, though I really didn't mean for it to sound bad. I just wanted my grandson to know that he had been correct; people should not be yelling and cussing like that. I wanted him to understand that some behavior isn't ok and his instincts were sharp. I was trying to set a good example, teach, help--instead, I created a monster.

The irate woman heard me. The result was absolute rage.

She turned her screaming toward me, physically charging the elevator doors, thankfully too late to enter the elevator with us. She assumed that my being white meant that we “white people” don’t act like her (I can tell this by the things she was yelling at me — none of which I can repeat here) and as the doors to the elevator closed, I stood there stunned with my heart racing, clutching my terrified grandson’s hand.

I knew instantly I had made a terrible mistake. There was no time for me to explain to this woman that I wasn't trying to make a racial comment towards her--not that she would care to listen in her current state. There was no time for me to inform her that it was her behavior that caused the conversation between my grandson and myself--and not the color of her skin or anything else about her appearance. She was ranting and raving and causing a scene; I reacted. I didn't mean for her to hear my words and I am stunned she caught my ill-placed remark.

We exited the elevators two stories down and somehow the woman, followed by her two pleading sons, were soon right behind us. She was still screaming and causing a terrible scene. She was calling me names. Threatening violence. We hurried toward the parking area, all 5 of us, just trying to keep our heads down and not escalate the situation. Clearly this woman was unstable. And she was a large, intimidating woman. Not that this matters but I feel she could have hurt several of us if she wanted to do so. I remembered my partner's gun was in the car. I silently begged God that we wouldn't need it. Yes, the situation was that tense. I felt helpless and frightened.

The woman followed us to the parking deck, continuing her tirade. We hurried out of the parking deck to the street as we were so rattled that finding our car and doing it in a closed environment seemed like a terrible idea. The woman was now threatening to throw my two grandbabies, now crying, into the street to watch them get run over.

By now, they were both crying. My grandbabies, terrified. Just babies! This woman wanted to throw them into the street and watch cars drive over their dying or lifeless bodies!

This whole time, none of us were saying anything. We ignored and ignored and she kept ranting but eventually moving away from us and down the street. We fiddled with our phones in the sunlight, trying to see the buttons to call 911. As her sons dragged her away, we made our way back into the hospital and had the staff at the desk call security for us.

Weeks later, the anxiety still rattled me and I woke up at night from the nightmares of my precious grandbabies being killed, that woman's voice still playing over and over in my mind. I wonder where she is today. If she's ever hurt anyone. If she behaves this way in public, I can only imagine what she does in private. And clearly, for her, hurting children is not off the table. The trauma of this event shook me.

I don’t know why people are so angry. Or why we have lost the ability to just be kind to each other. Just see each other as human beings. We are all here with the same love in our hearts for life and family, hopes and dreams, visions for what our life could be, struggles and bills, health concerns, losses, moments of laughter.

“If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.” — Chinese Proverb

We all look in the mirror and analyze the way our hair sticks up or how the arch of our brow looks weird on one side or whether or not our hair looks grayer today or whether or not we look like our Uncle Ray.

We all think about death and traffic. We all get hungry. And we all need kindness.

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