At least I’m not him | Jon Caldara

I am recovering from back surgery. I am losing the war of attrition against ear hair. My mind is as immature as when I was 14, yet I have the mobility of a 90-year-old.

And those are my good days.

But whenever I start feeling sorry for myself, one thought instantly cheers me up.

At least I’m not Phil Weiser.

Schadenfreude is not a virtue. Fortunately, I have never let virtue interfere with enjoying myself.

Phil, you wanted to be governor. You asked for the bludgeoning reality is going to give you.

Your fellow progressives built the disaster you now get to manage. They spent years filling the swimming pool. Congratulations on being handed the toaster.

Colorado is in serious economic trouble. If your airplane’s instruments showed you were out of gas, stalling and upside down, you would probably stop worrying about the beverage service.

Colorado’s economic dashboard looks much the same.

At the recent state demography summit, the state’s own experts laid out the wreckage: For the first time in Colorado history, the state is losing jobs without a national recession to blame.

Colorado lost about 5,000 jobs last year while the country added jobs.

That takes talent. Usually, you need a recession to produce recession results. Our progressive leadership has eliminated the middleman.

Weld, Douglas and Arapahoe counties gained jobs, as Denver alone lost 4,600 jobs. With downtown office vacancies approaching 40%, the city’s most successful growth industry appears to be “For Lease” signs.

Meanwhile, net migration has collapsed. Last year, only about 3,500 more people moved into Colorado than left, compared with closer to 60,000 the year before.

And what jobs awaited the newcomers? Outside healthcare, most new jobs were in government.

We have developed an economic model in which everyone works for the government, and the government sends the bill to whomever hasn’t left yet.

Colorado has become unaffordable and inhospitable to business. Fewer people come. Fewer businesses grow. Fewer taxpayers remain to finance the ambitions of legislators who have never encountered a problem that couldn’t be solved by hiring a deputy director.

Enjoy your first budget, Phil.

The state demography office projects that by 2050, Colorado will have only two employed people for every retired person. Just a few years ago, that ratio was five to one.

Two people pulling the wagon. One riding. And an expanding state bureaucracy issuing regulations on wagon safety.

The major source of state revenue is … income tax. But retirees don’t have jobs.

An aging population means more demand for healthcare and social services, including Medicaid, while the pool of workers financing those demands shrinks.

Good thing Medicaid is swimming in money.

The Joint Budget Committee’s own staff explained how legislators created this mess: They used one-time pandemic money to engorge the Medicaid roles.

Apparently “one-time” struck them as more of a suggestion.

Washington sent temporary money. Colorado politicians developed permanent appetites. Now the money is gone, the obligations remain, we get the check and Phil oversees the mess.

Then there’s Amendment 87, Colorado’s new graduated income tax.

Lamely saying he couldn’t speak up due to litigation, Weiser waited until moments before the election, after ballots were already pouring in, to announce his opposition.

A stirring display of leadership. Issue an iceberg statement after the passengers boarded the lifeboats.

Phil, you could have stopped this tax.

Colorado’s regulatory overreach has already chased away some 100 employers. Raising taxes on successful businesses is a terrific recruitment strategy for Texas and Florida.

People who build businesses like going where they are welcomed. Colorado increasingly greets them with a clipboard, an invoice and a lecture about their obligations to people carrying clipboards.

Amendment 87 might produce an early revenue windfall. Legislators will spend it, congratulate themselves and discover that taxpayers can rent moving trucks.

New York and California have been conducting this experiment for years. Apparently, Colorado needed to touch the stove personally.

And I haven’t even gotten to energy.

The state plans to eliminate the fossil fuels supplying two-thirds of our power. Businesses considering Colorado can look forward to higher taxes, higher costs and the exciting possibility of conducting meetings by flashlight.

But look on the bright side, Phil.

Your party’s policies will chase away so many businesses and people that maybe we won’t need much electricity after all.

Jon Caldara is president of the Independence Institute in Denver and hosts “The Devil’s Advocate with Jon Caldara” on Colorado Public Television Channel 12. His column appears Sundays in Colorado Politics.